25% of the Country is Certifiably Insane

Email Print posted by Cenk 01/01/2007 11:31:46 PM EST

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But there is one number that stands out among the rest as absolutely unbelievable. Twenty-five percent of Americans believe that Jesus Christ will return to earth in 2007. TWENTY-FIVE PERCENT! IN 2007!

The Associated Press and AOL recently did a year end poll where they asked people to make predictions on 2007. There were some interesting findings, like the fact that there are more Americans who think that the draft will be reinstated next year (35%) than those who think we will withdraw our forces from Iraq (29%).

There are also numbers that showed how well the public is attuned to the current political and economic climate, with eighty percent predicting an increase in the minimum wage and ninety percent predicting higher gas prices.

But there is one number that stands out among the rest as absolutely unbelievable. Twenty-five percent of Americans believe that Jesus Christ will return to earth in 2007. TWENTY-FIVE PERCENT! IN 2007!

These people are nuts. There's no polite way of saying it. If I sound superior, too bad. Sanity has its advantages.

If some of the famed cultural warriors of the right want to take me on and defend their cherished Christian cohorts, step on up. I'll take every one of them on and win very, very easily.

Here's my plan for victory - wait till 2008. When Jesus doesn't come - again, for the 2,007th time - I will be proven right. Will the people who believed he was coming in 2007 change their minds? Of course not. They'll just say he's coming in 2008. And on and on it goes.

He isn't coming! I will make any wager, pay any price and do any act that anyone demands of me if I am proven wrong. Here it is, a simple challenge: Name your price, in money, actions, deeds or words - and I will pay it if I am wrong. If Jesus comes in 2007, you win. If he doesn't, I win.

I am not going to ask that any of the believers wager anything in return. I am not going to do a Terrell Owens like celebration when I win. I am not going to ask for my pound of flesh. The only thing I ask for when the cultural warriors of the right lose this bet is that they look into counseling.

You people are seriously disturbed. You think a magic man is going to appear out of the sky and grant you eternal bliss. If the man's name was anything other than Jesus, that belief would get you locked up as a psychotic. And the fact that you have given him this magic name and decided to call him your Lord doesn't make it any more sane.

Imagine for a second if instead of Jesus, some psycho was waiting for a magical creature named Fred to come save him this year and suck him up into the sky. Now, who doesn't think that man needs serious counseling and perhaps medical supervision? Now, you change Fred into Jesus, and you have 25% of the country.

Sometimes the world scares me. It is full of psychotics who go around pretending to be rational human beings. You think that's offensive, then prove me wrong. I dare you. Show me Jesus in 2007 and I'll do whatever you demand of me.

The Young Turks

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25% of the Country is Certifiably Insane | 7 comments (7 topical, 0 hidden)
Taking it a bit too far? (none / 0)
On this one, I disagree with you. There is such a thing as taking "common sense" too far y'know.

While I don't share the beliefs of the 25%, nor do I really know what possible reason they have to think JC was coming in 2007, I wouldn't go as far as calling them insane. On the contrary, I think this kind of thinking is only to be expected, and given the circumstances, is to be considered normal.

Take into consideration the upbringing of a person that would have this kind of an opinion. Either religion had a large part in their family, or their youth was a figurative hell, and religion was their sanctuary. It goes way back. Freedoms blade cuts in both ways; while it prevents someone elses beliefs to be forced upon a people, it also gives birth to a "keep out" mentality, the kind that sees their faith, however wrong it might seem to some, as endangered. This outlook tells you both how such beliefs started, as well as why they persist to this day.

Nihilism encroaches upon the world. It can't really be denied, people are becoming more apatetic to nigh everything that goes on in the world, and with the extreme proliferation of knowledge (proliferation being the perfect word, since some knowledge can seem almost like a weapon to a conservative mind) brings out a sense of paranoia in someone already desperate to cling to his/her old beliefs.

Faced with the slow decay of religion, the instinctive reaction is to put a spotlight on religion for ones children, teaching them the old values, and casting profane ideas into bad light. While it happens that with the internet, the tv, and the right schools, a young mind rejects traditional beliefs, it is a sad fact that people will more likely take to the simplistic offering of eternal bliss after death if the life is lived "correctly"

Where's the insanity? If you are brought up in a strict religious environment - and it does have its benefits, quite a few at that - you will more likely than not grow up to be a religious person. If I remember correctly, a bit more than a third of the world is christian, and while 25% out of 33% taking such an extreme viepoint is on the far side of the curve, it is sadly to be called "normal" rather than "insane"

Oh, and I'll take your bet. I'll consider counseling anyway, and the infinitesimal chance I have of winning is ok considering there is no downside hehe

Wow, that turned out quite a bit longer than I intended ... oh well


by Aeryes on 01/02/2007 12:39:21 AM EST

Are they crazy or do they only THINK they're crazy (none / 0)
Okay, maybe I'm naive, but I have a really hard time believing that such a high percentage of people really truly for real bet-your-life-on-it believe that JC'll return this year. I wonder how many of them instead believe that they SHOULD BELIEVE that he will come back. Or even actually believe that they believe that he'll come back. After all, they want to be good people, and good people believe in God, don't they? So these people must believe in God, right? But put a middle eastern guy in a robe speaking Arhamaic in the middle of the street and see how many of them fall to their knees in worship and how many go for their rifles. (Of course, that isn't fair, calling JC a middle eastern guy; he's of course a pearly white, blue-eyed dude who speaks English with a perfect Amerrrican accent.)

by bal101 on 01/02/2007 01:12:55 AM EST

benefits of annonymity (none / 0)
Good point. However, the best thing about anonymus polls is that when people feel their answer cannot be connected to themselves, they are more likely to answer the way they really think.

Even so, 25% is rather surprising. To be honest, I get this feeling of a random poll anomaly; that a large majority questioned was very religious - even 25% of those is too much though, or that non-fanatics either hung up on the pollsters or gave sarcastic answeres ...

Any way I try to think of it, 25% is too much. I'm even thinking there might be mistakes or tampering with the poll...

by Aeryes on 01/02/2007 01:41:13 AM EST

[ Parent ]
Whats the Vegas Line on this? (none / 0)
Are they giving anything close to 3-1 against or is the money moving towards him coming back? Now might be the time to jump on this.

Thanks for the tip!

by Tom Paine Jr on 01/02/2007 01:49:13 AM EST

Returning in what form? (none / 0)
I wouldn't bet against Jesus returning as a salt stain below a Chicago overpass.

by Twba on 01/02/2007 02:00:06 AM EST

Oh man, I was one of those 25% (none / 0)

    I was a respondent to that poll and I thought they were talking about Jesus Maria Rojas Alou

Bats Right, Throws Right Height 6' 2", Weight 195 lb SF Giants, then Oakland Athletics, New York Mets and finally Houston Astros.  I know it was a long shot but with the Rolling Stones still on tour and half of the Vietnam War era politicians back at their old posts, I guess a comeback by Jesus A. ( Jay ) seemed like it made sense.

I'm 100% certain that Jesus C. will be making a comeback, because the light moss that grows on my carport has surrendered into an image of Don Ho.  I'm sure I don't have to spell out the rest of this for you all.

 

 

by SeattleStory on 01/02/2007 02:09:22 AM EST

I love Jesus! (none / 0)
Man, I loved Jesus Alou. I remember watching him play in the Astrodome when I was 12 years old!

In fact, I like his entire family:

Brother of Felipe Alou, Brother of Matty Alou, Cousin of Jose Sosa, Uncle of Moises Alou, and Uncle of Mel Rojas

by KenTX on 01/02/2007 02:18:59 AM EST

[ Parent ]
25% of the Country is Certifiably Insane | 7 comments (7 topical, 0 hidden)
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